alex, london, media

When I finally got the role I'd been informally doing for almost a year, the salary offer was well below what I knew the previous person in the job had earned. I raised it, politely, with evidence. My manager told me I should be grateful — that not everyone gets opportunities like this, that I was "still building my profile." I nodded. I smiled. I signed the contract. On the way home I thought about all the months I had done that job unpaid, all the times I had been told to be patient, all the ways the word grateful had been used to make me feel that wanting fair pay was somehow presumptuous. It wasn't until I talked to a friend that night that I realised: gratitude is something you feel freely. It's not something someone demands from you in lieu of a fair salary.

#downplaysachievements #underminesqualifications #shiftexpectations #manipulation #confidenceeroded